Friday, May 29, 2009

on FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is defined as the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, and ceasing to demand punishment or restitution. Oxford defines it as , to grant free pardon and to give up all claim on account of an offence or debt'....

hmmmmmm depending on the degree of a thing done to us maybe also is the degree too of how easy it will be also to forgive.. this i think is the commmon track of thought.

if we have been victimized from child abuse to rape,to all others crimes, from psyhcological abuse, forgiveness doesnt mean what happened to us is discounted, excused, overlooked, disregarded, trivialized, or the offense is being minimized for but its choosing to help yourself move on.

so, why is it hard to forgive???


.. we people find it hard to forgive because we have been hurt
.. we have been offended
.. the thing done may have caused us shame
.. we just cant let go
.. we focus on what we mght have lost person or thing
.. we want to carry it like a knapsack on our back
.. we just dont want to forgive
.. we even wish the other person to hell (....hmmmm not knowing that eventually that unforgiveness may take them there too.)


Unresolved anger is often a factor in addictive and compulsive behaviors and relapse. Holding on to old anger can cause people to avoid conflict, procrastinate, and give up their needs. It can poison relationships and prevent true intimacy. It breeds bitterness, resentment, mistrust and fear.

"People who carry around a lot of resentment tend to be more reactive to day-to-day situations," said Rosemary Hartman, supervisor of the Hazelden Family Program in Center City, Minn. "If a driver makes a slight error in judgment on the highway, some people may react by screaming or shaking a fist at the driver--not because of the actual occurrence, but because they have a huge bank of anger inside that is tapped with the slightest provocation.

Many people have a lot of anger inside them, but not realize it. Accepting that we are angry and identifying the reasons why, may help us begin to let go. We need to work through the anger and move beyond it to forgiveness and reconciliation. Otherwise, were just stuck in a cycle of resentment and bitterness."

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. Forgiveness does not mean martyrdom. Forgiveness does not guarantee trust or reconciliation. BUT.....

according to ...
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross identified denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance as the five stages of grieving (or dying, or loss). Forgiveness is what you do when acceptance is not enough, when you've lost something important -- a relationship, a dream, a self-image, a physical ability -- and you still feel empty or bitter inside.You start forgiving the other person for having died or having left you or having injured you. Forgiveness completes the grieving process, allowing you not only to “move on,” but to become stronger and more loving.


FORGIVENESS – is giving love when theres no reason specially if the person does not deserve it. Unforgiveness and not letting go can lead us to completely miss the opportunity weve been given to learn about real love. healing and peace. ... By embracing forgiveness, we embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy... and also....forgiving always feels better than hating and hurting.

No comments:

Post a Comment

FORGIVENESS CORNER

FORGIVENESS CORNER
this corner is for those who we want to forgive and those for whom we pray for forgiveness, let us ask Jesus to help us and open our hearts to forgiveness and forgiving. Look at the Cross and tell Jesus, Lord i want to forgive, im finding it hard to do so, help me. I chose to forgive and leave everything in Your loving hands.

THE ARCHANGELS


ST. MICHAEL -
(Archangel of those born on a Sunday) Prince of the Heavenly Hosts, the Commander in Chief of all the hierarchies of the Heavenly Hosts, the Angel who defeated Luciferadn His followers in the first rebellion or creatures against God. By his battlecry: MI-Ca-EL " Who is like unto God?.. the first defender of the Blessed Virgin Mary in the Mystery of the Incarnation ( Dan 10:12 12:1 Apoc.12:7)

ST GABRIEL
- ( ARCHANGEL of those born on a Monday ) Special messenger of God, bearer or Gods secret messages to His chosen ones.( luke 1:19) (Daniel 8:19 9:21)

ST. RAPHAEL - ( ARCHANGEL of those born on aTuesday) Healer & Guide for the Christian pilgrim, patron also of Singles wanting to find their partner in marriage.He also gives the light to discern correctly Gods ways and protects us from dangers that befall us on our way to our heavenly home.

ST. URIEL - ( ARCHANGEL of those born on a Wednesday) Archangel of Justice, reminds us of Divine Justice, to whatever we do good or bad, reminds us of the terrible justice of God upon the world for the human pride and Godlessness with which human affairs are conducted.

St. SEALTIEL - ( ARCHANGEL of those born on a Thursday) Archangel of Worship & Contemplation, stands before God with incenser in hand, his angelic purity transforms the love and worship we mortals give to God.

ST. JHUDIEL - (ARCHANGEL of those born on a Friday) Archangel of Divine Mercy. Gods mercy comes to us in every moment of our lives.Without it we would die.Mercy is gracefor bodily and spiritual needs. Mercy is God Himself through the m,erits of Jesus Christ bringin us back to our Heavenly home

ST. BARACHIEL - (ARCHANGEL of those born on a Saturday) Archangel of Divine Providence. the one who was assigned by God to keep watch over His adopted Children taking care that He and the Choirs of Angels assigned to the task guard these transformed souls in all their way, bearing them up ( Psalm 91, 12)

check the Perpetual Calendar in this blog fill it with your birthdate and know which archangel is in charge of you... God bless!